Zeus Exploits

"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body. It's better to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, with body totally worn out and screaming ~"WOO HOO what a ride!"

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Location: Granite Bay, CA

Work hard, play hard, be the best that you can be and when you can't - laugh!

Monday, May 22, 2006

Restaurant Story: "Clopen" & my friend's Mom!

There's a thing in restaurant business called a "Clopen". That's where you are scheduled to work a closing shift one night and open the next morning. This incident occured the night before Easter Brunch 1983 - An ugly day to work for tips, much like Mother's Day. The only cure is to drink the stress of Saturday night off so you can sleep enough to work the next morning.

I was waitering and bartending at the Rusty Duck in Sacramento. This night I was a waiter. I got off work and went with a fellow waiter, "Shoes", to the Ancient Moose restaurant next door. Many shots of tequila and beers later, I dropped him off at his Mom's apartment. He offered me a place on the couch so I could avoid getting popped for a DUI. I took him up on it, but asked him to leave the bathroom light on, because I get confused if I'm somewhere different when I wake in the middle of the night and especially when I'm drunk.

I quickly pass out on the couch. The next thing I know I'm awakened to someone screaming. It was his mom and I was standing in her closet about to take a leak! My friend hadn't left the bathroom light on and somehow I had made my way to his Mom's bedroom. I left his apartment immediately after I used their bathroom. I could hear Shoe's Mom yelling at him as I left.

I woke up the next morning without an alarm at 8:20. I was supposed to be at work at 8:30. I hate being late and even worse it was Easter Sunday Brunch. I had to bartend and setting up the bar was one of my most loathed jobs. It was a very long shift and it was nothing but pure hell - hungover and making lots of gin fizzes.


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