Zeus Exploits

"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body. It's better to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, martini in the other, with body totally worn out and screaming ~"WOO HOO what a ride!"

My Photo
Location: Granite Bay, CA

Work hard, play hard, be the best that you can be and when you can't - laugh!

Friday, February 17, 2006

Getting in shape at Middle Age, Cheese and the Amazon Woman

48 years old and 21 months from being 50. I started this blog because I feel I could nail any woman if I tried, but I won't because I want to stay married. The old saying, "once you step over the line, it's always easier cross". So, this is about those almost situations. My alter ego is Zeus, who went around nailing any woman he could in Ancient Greek Mythology while married to his sister, Hera. No, I didn't marry my sister. Greek Mythology was one of my favorite classes in college, and being somewhat of an extrovert, I used Zeus' philosophy as often as I could as pre-married man. I love good looking women, their breasts and a grrrrrrrrrreat ass! It is my elixir of life!

You see I wasn't born ugly, I look 5 to 10 years younger than I am. Someone thought I was 33 recently. I've been told in my life I look like, Robert Redford, Elvis, or even worse, Bill Clinton. I let myself get chubby over the last 10 years. I got tired of being fat and now I'm working hard to get back a body some woman would want to see, even if I am getting old enough to where the younger (20's) women consider me "gross".

So, yesterday, I'm scouring Whole Foods for some kind of lunch. I am starving because I'm working out an hour a day, 6 days a week. I just left an appointment across the street and I know that Whole Foods has samples out that will curb my appetite and my expenditure at the cash register. I walk past the pastry section, the pizza and food by the pound section and lock in all the delectable cheeses. There's always sample out.

As I approach, I notice this stunning older woman, probably just either side of 50. She's well dressed, about 6'2'', thin and blond. Great breasts, too. This makes the day a bonus. Every time I see an exceptional looking woman, I think, "what a great day"! We briefly made eye contact, nothing else.

With my stomach commanding control over my cerebral cortex versus the tool between my legs, I start circling the 8' x 12' cheese display looking for those little generous cups of cheese samples. I make the first turn, nothing, 2nd turn - nada (the big blocks bleu cheese looks incredible - my mouth waters) and as I circle around the 3rd corner of the cheese display, my Amazon woman is still standing there (nice ass!), blocking my path. Nothing like a double dip of eye candy. However, she looks back over her shoulder at me, makes eye contact, narrows her eyes like I'm stalking her. She must be used to it after all these years of looking like that. Most other days I could be guilty of taking an extra moment, or lap, to take a second look and get eye contact, a quick word, a SMILE. But today, the stomach ruled and I had to go around her to continue my search.

Now, without justification, I felt like a stalker, there were no cheese samples and Amazon's narrowed eyes meant she had no desires for me. It affected my choice of foods. I ended up with a very small sandwich from the "food by the pound" display, along with a small scoop of Cesar Salad and a nasty tasting sweet bar from the pastry section. Rejection and hunger are not a good combination. Thank God there's tomorrow.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, I recently added a news widget from www.widgetmate.com to my blog. It shows the latest news, and just took a copy and paste to implement. Might interest you too.

9:28 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home